Definitely Real Products Inc. — Home Security Division
THE FIREWALL
Your home's first line of defense.
Network-grade protection. Physical-world results.
Technical Specifications
Enterprise-Grade Home Defense
The Firewall brings the same principles that protect Fortune 500 networks to your living room wall. Studies show that 94% of would-be intruders report "reconsidering" upon seeing an open flame.*
COVERAGE ZONE ANALYSIS — STANDARD RESIDENTIAL DEPLOYMENT
FEATURE-01
Deep Packet Inspection
Every package left on your doorstep is visually inspected by The Firewall's motion-activated flame sequence. Suspicious parcels receive a longer inspection cycle. We cannot open them, but we look at them very intensely.
FEATURE-02
Port Security
Your front porch is a port. Your back door is also a port. The Firewall secures all visible ports via ambient LED illumination in a warm amber-orange spectrum scientifically calibrated to make them look guarded.
FEATURE-03
Intrusion Detection
Passive infrared motion sensor triggers an intensified flame animation within 0.3 seconds of proximity. The Firewall cannot call anyone or alert anyone. However, it does look considerably more alarming when someone approaches.
FEATURE-04
Stateful Inspection
The Firewall maintains an internal threat state of either IDLE or BLAZING. Transitions between states occur in response to motion events. The state persists until the motion clears. This is, by definition, stateful.
FEATURE-05
Zero-Day Deterrence
Unlike software firewalls that must be updated to recognize new threats, The Firewall's deterrent mechanism works on zero-day exploits, legacy attack vectors, and new threat actors, because fire looked dangerous before there were computers.
FEATURE-06
Always-On Coverage
The Firewall operates 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Flame animations continue regardless of whether any threat is present, because a perimeter that only looks defended during an attack has already failed.
* Internal study, n=17, participants asked leading question. Margin of error: ±47%. Study conducted under conditions that comply with RFC 1149.
Live Monitoring
Your Home Security Dashboard
Professional monitoring includes access to the DeRP Firewall Dashboard, updated in real time. View threat logs, blocked connections, and uptime statistics from any browser. Data is cosmetic and provided for peace of mind.
Threats Blocked
2,847
Since installation
Uptime
24/7
No exceptions
False Positives
3
The cat. All three.
Flame Intensity
87%
BLAZING status
Protection Plans
Choose Your Coverage Level
Every plan includes The Firewall decorative LED panel. Professional and Enterprise plans add 24/7 monitoring, which is a dashboard you can look at. Response time in all cases is limited to looking more on fire.
Basic
$299.99 one-time
The wall panel. It comes with LED flames. You install it. You feel safer. That's the product.
- Firewall LED panel (36" x 24")
- Motion-activated BLAZING mode
- IDLE / BLAZING state machine
- 18-month LED warranty
- Installation guide (PDF)
- Professional monitoring
- Threat log dashboard
- Whole-home perimeter
Professional
$19.99/mo
Includes monitoring. We watch your threat log. We cannot intervene. We observe and document. This is professional-grade watching.
- Everything in Basic
- 24/7 threat log dashboard
- Monthly security report (emailed)
- Priority LED replacement shipping
- Second panel (back entrance)
- Flame intensity customization app
- Whole-home perimeter
- Incident response team
Enterprise
$89.99/mo
Full perimeter coverage. Up to 8 panels covering all exterior-facing surfaces. Your home becomes a threat-by-fire-of-unknown-origin to anyone approaching.
- Everything in Professional
- Up to 8 panels (all entry points)
- Synchronized BLAZING events
- Dedicated account manager
- Quarterly perimeter audit (virtual)
- Custom threat sensitivity tuning
- DeRP Security sticker (front door)
- Actual incident response
Basic plan hardware required for all subscription tiers. Professional and Enterprise are month-to-month. "Monitoring" constitutes dashboard access only. DeRP personnel do not attend your home. RFC 2979 governs firewall behavior documentation. See terms.
Customer Stories
Families Protected by The Firewall
Verified homeowners share how The Firewall changed how they think about their perimeter. All testimonials are real. All names are real. Middle initials added for credibility.
"We had three separate incidents of solicitors approaching our door in 2024. After installing The Firewall in January 2025, we have had zero. I cannot prove causation. But I have not had to pretend I'm not home since February, and that's worth $299.99 to me."
Patricia R. — Columbus, OH — Enterprise subscriber since Q1 2025
"I work in network security. When I saw the term 'stateful inspection' applied to a decorative wall panel, I should have been skeptical. Instead I felt understood. I own four. My house looks like a server room that's on fire. I have never slept better."
Marcus T. — Austin, TX — CISSP, Enterprise subscriber
"The false positive rate is slightly higher than advertised. Our cat, Biscuit, has been 'neutralized' in the threat log over 200 times. She seems fine. The Firewall logs her as a recurring threat. Honestly, fair. Four stars because the dashboard says she's still blocked and she's on my lap right now."
Elena V. — Portland, OR — Professional subscriber
FAQ
Common Questions
Is The Firewall a real firewall?
The Firewall is a decorative LED wall panel that displays simulated flame effects. In the sense that it is a wall, and it has fire on it, the name is accurate. In the sense that it performs stateful packet inspection or blocks TCP/IP traffic, it does not do that. However, it does look like it might. Studies confirm that looking like something is often sufficient.
Can I integrate The Firewall with my existing home network?
The Firewall does not connect to your network. It connects to a standard 110V outlet. We recommend not connecting your actual network security infrastructure to a decorative flame panel. These are separate systems and should remain so. If you have integrated them, please call us. Not for support reasons. We just want to know how you did it.
What does "deep packet inspection" mean in the context of a wall panel?
When a package is delivered to your door, The Firewall's motion sensor activates a 3-second flame intensity increase. During this period, the package is technically within range of a lit LED display and can be considered inspected. We have defined "packet" broadly. This definition is consistent with RFC 1208, which we have not read but believe supports our position.
Will The Firewall actually deter intruders?
Fire has deterred threats since approximately 1.5 million BCE. The Firewall leverages this ancient and proven threat-response mechanism through modern LED simulation technology. We cannot legally guarantee deterrence. We can tell you that in recorded human history, no civilization has approached an open flame without at least pausing to think about it. Simulated flame appears to trigger the same pause. Possibly.
What happens when I call the Professional monitoring team during an incident?
Professional monitoring does not include a phone line. Professional monitoring includes a dashboard. The dashboard shows you what is happening. If something is happening, you can look at it on the dashboard, and then call emergency services yourself using a telephone. We are very clear about this in the terms of service, which are available in full at a font size of 8pt on page 11.
My cat keeps triggering the motion sensor. Can I add it to a whitelist?
Enterprise subscribers can adjust motion sensitivity through the DeRP Firewall app. The app includes a sensitivity slider from 1 (triggers in a light breeze) to 10 (requires an adult human moving with intent). Most cats fall in the 3-5 range. We recommend setting sensitivity to 7. Note that at sensitivity 7, very determined cats will still trigger the sensor. The dashboard will continue logging them. This is accurate threat intelligence.
Start Your Protection
Protect Your Home.
Look Like You Mean It.
Join over 14,000 households who have made their perimeter look significantly more dangerous. The Firewall doesn't promise zero incidents. It promises that anyone approaching your home will see fire first.
Get Protected — $19.99/mo30-day panel return policy. Monitoring month-to-month, cancel anytime. Hardware not included in cancellation.